Tagged with motherhood

Asking for Help: Me This Time

I’ve written before about asking for help: how hard it can be for a new mom to feel confident rather than inadequate when she asks; how hard it can be to ask friends and family while fearing rejection. I’ve encouraged women to seek support from postpartum doulas to ease this. In response, women have wished … Continue reading

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Give Some Love to a New Mom

Moms tend to take on the care and nurturing of everyone around us. Especially during the postpartum time, we need someone to care for and nurture us! When a friend had a new baby, I used to walk into her house and think, I want to be helpful, but what do I do? Through my … Continue reading

‘Lullabies are Love Songs’

“Lullabies are love songs,” says music educator Mary Thienes-Schunemann in her book The Wonder of Lullabies. She goes on: It is through the warmth of our own voices that our love for the child is most truly revealed. To a child in the cradle or in arms, these love songs are the first melodies they hear. They … Continue reading

Letting Go of Advice

The barrage of advice is constant when you are a parent, especially a new one. Why does everyone feel equipped to comment on other people’s parenting, whether they have experience or not? So often well-meaning people seem to repeat what they’ve heard — echoing common tips without knowing the reasons behind them and without realizing … Continue reading

Building Support around You: Parent-Child Classes

New parents can feel so isolated — even the most well-meaning people around us can be ignorant about our experiences and our needs. We can feel invisible or even devalued. I’ve written about facing the outside world as a new mom. How can we find a safe place, where we feel understood, and where we are … Continue reading

New Mom vs Outside World

Being a new mom or dad is beautiful, intense, and life-changing. It also can be so very difficult: Often the world around us is not empathetic but can be brutal, judgmental, and overwhelming. It is often said that only people who have been through it can understand this drama of early parenthood. But why? Why … Continue reading

Your Postpartum Story

Our culture is full of myths and misconceptions about birth and the postpartum time. It’s time for us to tell real stories of our postpartum experiences, so that future new families can feel less lost and alone, knowing that they are in the company of many wonderful, loving, and strong families. I’d love to hear … Continue reading

How Long does ‘Postpartum’ Last?

Pregnant women in the US are exposed to many widely held beliefs about birth and the postpartum time that — they discover with shock and possibly pain, guilt, and sadness — are so very false. I believe we need to talk about these beliefs to prevent the shock and ease the other painful emotions that … Continue reading

Asking for Help Feels Strange

As a postpartum doula, my job is to nurture and care for the vulnerable, new family; most especially the new mom. Some people ask, “Isn’t that just for people who need extra help? Like with twins or medical issues or depression?” While many women have said to me, “I didn’t know I could ask for … Continue reading